CONFIDENCE & SELF-ESTEEM
The love and approval of others does not create self-esteem, but it can aid in the growth of our self-esteem. When others love and affirm us, it is a wonderful gift, however, this is ultimately not what builds our feelings of self-worth. We must learn to recognize and appreciate ourselves by recognizing and nurturing the best parts of ourselves.
"what builds our feelings of self-worth"
Self-Esteem
Comparing ourselves to others; negative self-talk; being torn down or mistreated by others; or past failures can often prevent us from thinking about our good qualities. Instead, we allow the old tapes to play repeatedly in our mind. These old tapes must be not only erased but replaced with new truths and self-acceptance.
There are no perfect people – only growing people. In fact, the ability to be a “growing” person is one of the three key traits shown to exist in those with high self-esteem. Likewise, our efforts in life are not black and white; they fall on a continuum. Our self-esteem can take a hit when we are constantly comparing ourselves to others, or to a standard that is perfect; or when we allow others to set unreasonably high standards for us. Are you a growing person? Or a perfectionistic person? The answer will impact your level of self-acceptance, and ultimately your self-esteem.
Self-Acceptance
Accepting our imperfections is essential to good self-esteem. Each of us has good parts and bad parts; the goal is to integrate them into a whole, real, imperfect person who deserves self-acceptance and love amongst all the other less-than-perfect people in the world.
Self-Esteem Counseling and Therapy
To learn to accept our imperfections, we need to first become aware of when we reject our imperfections; and learn to accept in the moment the growing parts of ourselves, not the “perfect” parts of ourselves.
Talking to an Orange County therapist is different than a friend. They are non-judgmental and trained to help you identify thought patterns, beliefs, old wiring, and communication skills that have undermined your confidence and can work with you to learn new skills to enhance your self-confidence in relationships, work, and other important areas of your life.
In-Office
or
Teletherapy
